Beware of Folgers coffee.

Why do you ask?  Interesting self-observation.  Drinking Folgers Classic Roast coffee has the unexpected and not entirely unwanted side effect of causing me to become emotionally and psychologically unhinged to the point of becoming dangerous to myself and those around me.  Does Folgers get their coffee from China or what?  Perhaps it has been irradiated or its the product of genetic manipulation.

I don’t know for certain, I am merely speculating but what I have noticed is that for the past few days I have been drinking Folgers at work and on each of those days I have exhibited varying degrees of psychotic and abnormal behavior.  I won’t bore you with the details but let’s just say that it has been interesting and I am probably lucky to still be employed.

Sure, there is the off chance that the cause of my deviant behavior is due to job related stress or some other undiagnosed mental issue but I don’t think that I behave like this when I am drinking Starbucks or the generic instant brew I get from Winco here in Beaverton.  I’ll skip the workplace Folgers tomorrow and see if that has any noticeable effects on my behavior and then I’ll go from there.

Until then, beware the Folgers man.

I am a simple man with simple tastes. When it comes to caffeine my drinks of choice are Earl Grey tea by Stash and quad espressos.

I was living in Albuquerque for about a year back in 2006-2007 and was able to frequent several coffee slingers and will now give you a brief critique on each of them. Keep in mind, the only drink that I have ordered at each of these locations has been the quad espresso.

From best to worst:

1. Satellite Coffee – 2201 Louisiana ** Great coffee and located right by Coronado Mall, this is my favorite spot to grab a quick jolt while out and about. The staff is always attentive and courteous. Muy bien.
2. Starbucks Coffee – 3400 Central Avenue SE ** This is a classic Starbucks, just like the type found back in Portland and Seattle. They make a mean quad espresso, the baristas have just the right amount of attitude and the outdoor patio makes for good people watching.
3. Satellite Coffee – 2300 Central Avenue SE ** Quite chic, a bit pretentious but the baristas here are very nice and the espressos are made just right. Nice outdoor patio but the location opens you up to be pestered by street people looking for money or just muttering to themselves.
4. Starbucks Coffee – Market Place at Journal Center ** To date this is the gayest Starbucks I have come across since leaving Portland but this location also makes an excellent quad espresso and after all, that is what really matters.
5. Satellite Coffee – 3513 Central Avenue NE ** The espressos here are merely adequate and the clientele are a bit full of themselves. The baristas tend to lack any personality. The big draw here is the comfy chairs in the back.
6. Starbucks Coffee – I-40 & San Mateo ** Located at The Pavillions at San Mateo, this Starbucks makes pure swill. This has been the most god awful coffee I have tasted in all of Albuquerque. Additionally, the interior is not the cleanest. The local gas stations are cleaner and have better coffee than this Starbucks. Merely adequate.

So there you have it, my opinion on the local coffee scene in Albuquerque, New Mexico. No doubt that there are many other places that serve excellent coffee and as I discover them I will add them to my list.